[SCA-Dance] The Creepy, the rude, and the weird

Scot and Michelle Henry cshenry at peoplepc.com
Wed Jul 29 13:45:47 EDT 2009

I'm not sure if this fits with your class since it's more of a good
etiquette situation, but it is related to this post.  Sometimes (although it
sounds like the situations mentioned below don't really fit into this
scenario), those that repeatedly ask the same people are doing so because
they are not comfortable with asking others that they don't really know.

So, my advice to all is: Ask those that are standing on the sidelines to
dance, even if they are not part of your group or if you don't know them. 
I primarily travel to dance events outside of my kingdom and although I try
not to be too shy about asking others to dance with me, I do appreciate
being asked much more than having to do the asking myself.  Being asked by a
local dancer is especially helpful if it's a dance that might have a
regional variation.  As a visitor, it's also a lot more difficult to know
who is really interested in dancing and who is mainly at the event to hang
out with their friends, whereas a visitor is almost certainly there to

Just a humble opinion, 

-----Original Message-----
From: sca-dance-bounces+cshenry=ev1.net at sca-dance.org
[mailto:sca-dance-bounces+cshenry=ev1.net at sca-dance.org] On Behalf Of Monica
Sent: Tuesday, July 21, 2009 9:39 PM
To: sca-dance at sca-dance.org
Subject: Re: [SCA-Dance] The Creepy, the rude, and the weird

Hygeine, particularly body odor and very sweaty hands, as others have 

One I haven't seen mentioned yet: being a pest.  That we shared a dance or 
even two does not mean I'm going to dance every dance with you, or go for 
a walk with you afterwards, or spend all of the *next* ball with you. 
It's a dance, not a first date with a second date already lined up.  I 
try to be friendly and I certainly understand the awkwardness of being the 
new person who doesn't know anyone (been in that situation a lot myself), 
but you've got to be willing to move around.  If someone tries to glue
himself to me and doesn't pick up on hints like "I'm trying to dance with
lots of people" or "here, let me introduce you to...", I feel like my 
choices are to leave or to be rude, neither of which I want to do.


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