[SCA-AE] was Background checks for youth, now youth stuff

[Tessa the Huntress]

Well, I know some of us already had to get these
clearances for work.  I'm wondering and thinking that
should work for this, too.  Anyone know the answer to
that??

It's a shame it's come to this.  I know when I grew up
in the Society, that I had a whole bunch of adopted
dads/moms and older brothers and sisters (like 10
years older).  Back then, the canton I grew up in was
like a huge family and I would feel sorry for anyone
who tried to mess with me.  I was also comfortable and
there were always multiple adults that were close by
if I did run into a problem.

I miss those days and that sense of family.  Back then
I felt welcome and wanted at events and participating
in different activities.  Now more often then not, I
get a sense from some people that children are a
burden and something to endure.  I know others have
felt this as well.  I think this "new" procedure will
just make it worse and harder to have/encourage more
things for our youth at events. I've always liked
encouraging them to participate in as much as their
age and/or maturity level will allow, instead of only
or mostly being in some far off corner or room on the
site.  

I'm not asking for others to watch my child or other
people's children.  Those individuals who seem to
rarely watch their children should be handled and
talked to individually, since perhaps they don't
realize how their children are disrupting the event or
causing a problem.  It's hard, but if you are polite
and go talk to them, perhaps that will work better
then treating all of the youth like those few who do
cause problems.

It's felt to me, since I moved here, that a good
number of people tend to assume all children (or the
vast majority) will cause problems and be something to
be endured.  I don't understand why, since from what
I've seen most of our youth are well-behaved.  There
are some who aren't, but it's not fair or right to
lump them all together.

I fondly remember being "fought" over at events and
even during my summer vacation.  By different adults
who wanted to spend time with me and teach me stuff,
everything from dancing, making leather gloves, making
a round shield, to making a "proper" anglo-saxon over
and under dress.  

Unfortunately, our world is different now and I doubt
that many of us will be comfortable with our children
spending a weekend or even a week or two in this
barony or that barony, with trusted friends/family.  I
know I loved the weekends that I spent with Earl Kane,
Duke Olaf, the oldcastles and the weeks I spent in the
Barony of Hidden Mountain, staying at different houses
(because the people they were all fighting at who's
house I would be staying, so instead they decided I
would stay 3 days here, 2 days there, etc-which my mom
knew all about).  I learned tons of things, but mostly
I learned that these people, all quite different
individuals were my family.  Not the one I was born
in, but the one that I chose.  

I hope that as my daughter grows, she will learn the
same thing.  Fostering is period and it's something I
wish we saw more of.  We all have really close friends
and family in the SCA and I think it would be awesome
to see more fostering (we did one at kingdom 12th
night), perhaps more of our youth learning from our
peers (and those on the path) how to do specific arts,
service and fighting.  I know of some instances where
this has happened, but they are few.. I'm really
surprised that I haven't seen this happen more.  We
have youth who are talented, driven and want to learn
more, I believe we should see what we can do to
encourage that.  

I truly hope that having to go thru clearances won't
discourage other avenues of teaching our youth,
especially by those that we do trust and have faith
that they will treat our child(ren) just as well as we
do ourselves.  

This is long-winded, but I wanted to add a bit more. 
We seem to have problems (at times)finding people to
run youth activities.  I do believe having an area to
do youth activities, especially at something like
Crown Tourney is a good thing.  However, I wish we
could also look back in time and realize that in
period, often the children did the same type of
activities as the adults.  

When we travelled to Great Western War, a couple of
years ago, I was happily surprised that children there
seemed to be welcomed in all of the activities in some
fashion.  Kate's love of music was spotted quickly and
we had a pavillion of adults (who were practising
different instruments) basically plead for us to leave
her there, because they wanted to show her the
different instruments and teach her how.  I was
shocked, even though we would only be a few feet away,
since I hadn't run into many people who wanted to do
that (especially as a group).  But we ran into that
attitude and feeling time and time again at that
event.  It felt to me that children weren't a burden
there or something to be endured, but rather were a
treasure and people that they could share their
knowledge/talents with.

I know we have people here like Mistress Guiletta who
will have our youth serve as list runners and the
older as list heralds.  We have cooks who do the same.
 As a parent, it is very hard to know who will welcome
my child (who does work hard when her mind is set on a
task) to those who see her presence as a burden.  I
would love for her to be able to learn from this
wonderful kingdom, full of people who all have their
own talents (many that I do not have, unfortunately),
skills and knowledge. I am worried that this ruling
could deter people from wanting (or perhaps being
scared of false accustations/issues) to spend time
with our youth.

I hope this ruling is or will be carefully spelled out
to distinguish between "official" and "unofficial"
youth activities.  That the official ones, where many
children can be found will not be lumped together with
the laurel, the knight or the pelican who have or will
take a child or two under their wing (for a span of
time) to teach, etc..  As a parent, it is my
responsibility to take care of my child, to make
certain that if I'm not with her, I know where she is,
who is with her (and that I trust them) and that she's
safe.  This ruling does not change that. It should not
change who I'm comfortable with my daughter being
around.  

I believe and I hope that the ruling does (or will)
clearly distinguish between the two very different
circumstances, my daughter being with strangers (or
those people I may not know well) at the "official"
youth activities at an event.. and "unofficial" ones..
like helping Niveah in the kitchen, running
errands/messages for Guiletta, having individual
fighting instruction from Sir AEngus, etc.. Those are
people that I know and I trust with my daughter. 
That's not "official", so the clearances shouldn't be
needed, IMO in those or similar instances.  

Perhaps, we can use this time to re-evalute what we do
with our youth in this kingdom.  How we can encourage
them to do more, safely with those that we trust and
get them more involved with our kingdom.  They have
great energy, if we get more of them involved perhaps
that will take some of the burden off the shoulders of
those who always take on the heavy tasks.  They have
joy and those of us who have lost our joy or some of
it.. in those things that we used to love to do at
events, might be well advised to help teach a youth
and in so doing may re-discover their own joy, by
looking thru a childs eyes.  

Thanks to those who read this to the end.  This is a
subject that I have thought about for a while, with no
clear resolution.  Let's use this time to bring some
good out of the situation.  :) Please forgive any
typos/grammer, etc I have like 2 minutes before I have
to leave for work.

Tessa, Duchess of AEthelmearc



> Suggestion:  *EVERYBODY* / Anybody who believes that
> they will be a
> teacher, autocrat, officer (at any level),
> participate in a demo, etc.
> -- APPLY!
> Just as soon as the system details are made
> available.



       
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