[SCA-AE] Pennsic Etiquette

[Alheydis von Körckhingen]

laura lindsay wrote:

>Was I wrong to insist a
>certain coronetted man proceed ahead of me by virtue
>of the metal on his pate when he wanted to allow me to
>go ahead?
>
At one of my very first events years ago, a gentleman offered to help me 
carry a large basket. I declined, but thanked him. A friend of mine, who 
happened to also play SCA and was at the event, gently educated me that, 
as a lady, I had deprived a gentleman of an opportunity to be 
chivalrous. His gift to me was the offer of assistance; mine to him 
would have been a smile and a genuine thank you. I have tried to always 
remember that lesson, although I lapse many a time in my eager to "do."

And for what it's worth, my husband, a girlfriend of mine and I had an 
interesting discussion a while back. My husband was lamenting that when 
he holds a door for a woman, she almost always holds the second door for 
him. My friend and I asked him, "Well, what's a woman supposed to do, 
just stand there while the guy walks around her and opens the next 
door?!?" His answer was, "Of course."

I love taking one of my sons to the mall and observing how people 
respond when they see him open both doors for me while I just stand 
there. I always smile and say thank you. Older gentlemen, especially, 
seem to be very pleasantly surprised. (BTW, our boys often open and 
close my car door for me too. I like it! - Now if I could just get them 
to clean their rooms...)

A couple of pence worth-
Alheydis

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THLady Alheydis von Körckhingen